So Shy

Interesting to observe that most women in America cover up when breast feeding their child, however most are not so shy in showing their cleavage. Vietnamese women on the other hand does not cover up when breast feeding their child but barely ever show their cleavage. So I wonder which side of the earth atmosphere is shyer?

The Fraternity Madness

Seattle Times ran an article about strong preference for boy in Vietnam, which to me is madness. Our culture and traditions are murdering thousands if not hundred of thousands baby just because Asian (and specially Vietnam, Chinese, and Indian) have a strong preference for boy. This issue begs an extremely simple question, what if there’s no girl for your boy to continue the lineage? It’s sad that we don’t treat our women better and now abortion is rampage with the government limiting two child per family in Vietnam.

I’m Vietnamese at core, but I have no preference as to if it is a boy or girl as children. It’s sickening to me that people are having abortion because their husband prefer a boy over a girl. It’s madness.

NO!

Vietnam and majority of other Asian countries are considered a high-context society. That is our culture, “referred to as collectivistic, or interdependent… and are hierarchical and traditional societies in which the concepts of shame and honor are much more important than they are in low-context societies.” The Vietnamese dislike direct confrontation and for the most part avoid expressing a clear “no.” Evasion and inaccuracy are preferred in order to keep appearances pleasant. There is a danger of losing face simply by not reaching an agreement with another person or group, if that was the goal.

Freedom

It is perfectly acceptable for the children to stay home with their parents until they’re married.  That is to say, if you’re in your late 30’s and going on forty and you’re single… it’s okay to stay home with your parents even though you have a job and you can manage perfectly on your own.  Mom & dad would be perfectly happy to make all the decisions for you even though you’re the one who’s actually the bread and butter.  Want to live on your own?That’s a big no no. Mom & dad will pestering you about how supportive is Auntie Z’s son and how happy Auntie Z is having her son staying at home. If you’re a girl and single, it would take an act of God for you to actually leave home and live on your own. Mom & dad will first attempt to scare and threaten you, and if all else fail… they might try to reason with you.

Who’s paying the bill?

It is common in most Asian countries to fight for who’s paying the bill in restaurant. It is even more so for Vietnamese. Auntie Z and her family are in town and everybody is at the restaurant, once the meals are consumed… auntie Z will dash to the waitress and attempt to settle the bill only to be stopped by mom who is watching auntie’s every moves. Auntie Z will insisted on paying the bill while mom will said that auntie Z is not in town often and paying for this bill would really make mom feels bad. Mom will usually win and auntie Z will said that next time when mom and dad are visiting auntie Z, auntie Z will settle the bill (which will often be the case).

Eating

It’s a common sense that one must compliments the food regardless of how good or bad it is… especially if it is your friend’s mom, girlfriend’s or boyfriend’s mom, or you’re being invited over for dinner. You must eat everything that you’re given to and usually it’s a lot of it. Peculiarly enough, if you’re going out to a restaurant with your girlfriend or boyfriend… you must not eat everything that’s on your plate. It will be interpreted as a sign of being barbaric. Always remember to leave some food on your plate even though you’re hungry as hell.

Love

Public displays of affection are generally prohibited, but same sex can hold hands in public, walk arm-in-arm, or just take a stroll down around the town with with their hand on a friend’s shoulder. Same sex can do almost everything that a typical couple would do except kissing, and that’s just the norms. Men in particular will find that people will touch you, squeeze your arm, pat your back and put their arm around your shoulder. This includes men, boys and young girls, but never women! Do not be alarmed, this is considered perfectly normal.

Gifts

Found this about Gifts:

Gift giving is not just reserved for special occasions; in fact the Vietnamese will find any excuse to give a gift!

Gift giving is a very common practice in both social and business settings. Meet a new friend? Give them a gift! Begin a new job? Buy the boss a gift! Quit your job? Buy the boss another gift! Moving? Buy your friends gifts!

Virtually any public holiday is an occasion to exchange gifts. Gifts need not be elaborate, a book, pen, food, tea, wine and liquor are common gifts. In business, when meeting a new client, try a bottle of Johnny Walker, or a carton of 555 cigarettes, better yet, both!

Vietnam’s National Treasure

Vietnamese Women! On average, Vietnamese women are much better looking than our countries’ neighbors. Chinese women? Those tiny almond eyes is not all that attractive. Japanese women? Um, those funny legs are not very impressive. Cambodian and Lao? Yeah, but too dark and unsophisticated. Thailand’s? Aren’t they all sluts or prostitutes or something? Korean? Err… they’re too submissive and those fake nose/eyes/boobs job would not withstand the standard abusive husband.

Now that the Koreans, Taiwanese, Chinese, the white-men and everywhere else have figure this… they can’t keep their hands off of our women.

Parenting Technique #2

Why should parents have open discussion when parents’ word is the law? It’s pretty much like this (in Karate Kid): “We make sacred pact. I promise teach karate to you, you promise learn. I say, you do, no questions.” Any question?